Stunway on Location: Dayton, OH

Yesterday morning, a friend of similar stature (read: petite) and I took on the seemingly insurmountable task of loading a one bedroom apartment into a 16 foot moving truck, then moving said truck to Dayton City, USA. It was a lot like Crossroads, except without the stupid Mimi girl. And we didn't have to sing Joan Jett in front of a bunch of strangers...we chose that, actually. Anyway, the point is you'd think after all that I'd want to hit the hay immeidately upon arrival at Maison du Blonde, mais non. I stayed up til 2 to watch some DVR'd PR, and though I was barely concious (and according to my travel companion, hallucinating) I still feel confident in the following assertion:

Leanne was robbed.

More to come, like, when I'm not blogging on my iPhone and driving at the same time. (Shh...it's cool. Everything's legal in Ohio.)

Jillian Lewis Answers Prayers Via Sweater Dress

According to the all-knowing PR source, my faaaaavorite Season Four contestant, Jillian Lewis, will be gracing the globe with her fall collection...wait for it...this August!!!  That's practically tomorrow, people!  Better get those credit cards ready, because I'm pretty sure you'll want one of everything...

For more details and pics, head over to our friends at Blogging Project Runway.  For info on the dress I plan to purchase the second it becomes available, see below: 

 

YAY!

LeathUGH!

I try so hard to stay positive when I blog. I realize that I was super hard on Ricky (and Carmen, and Sweet P...) last season, and I feel bad about ripping him so often, so I felt determined to be nicer to the designers this season.

Then, I met Stella.

STELLA!!!!!!!!! I can't handle her. I just can't. I hated her dress this week SO much. I think if it had passed through in the middle, I would have only been mildly nauseous (like I am about Jerell's atrocity). But the Top 3? Praise from Micheal Kors, for something that looks like a Hot Topic employee's prom dress? That, I will not stand for.

I'm sorry, but put simply, this is crap:

Apparently, Nina feels that shiny, tiny and short is the fastest way to look cheap. I agree, and I might add that shiny, tiny, short and LACED UP THE SIDES is an even more precise path to Trash Town? I mean...GOODNESS. What on God's green Earth is that thing?! Thank God for Natalie Portman, that little dose of sanity in the crazy caucus that is the PR judges' table. You could see her gritting her teeth, trying (and comme moi, failing) so hard to be positive. She was all, "Um...I kind of hate asymmetrical...um, on me...but, on other people? I guess...well...it could be nice." No, NatP! Don't give into Nina's hateful glare! Stand up for yourself!

The thing that irks me most, is that it's not like the judges were strapped for better dresses. This time, the award for "OMG How Did They Snub This?!" goes to Miss Terri. All three fashion forward (and might I add, adorable) inhabitants of my apartment shrieked in delight when this number took the stage. The top photographs un peu provocateur, but on the runway, it was a hit. Love the collar, love the belt, love the styling, love the model (SUCH good models this year!)...love it all. Love you, Terri. Well done.

Of course, had she made the top 3 she'd have faced some serious competition in the form of Kenley and Suede. First, let's talk Kenley. Have I told you lately that I love her? I haven't friend-crushed on a reality star this hard since Whitney from The Hills...but, no, seriously, Kenley and I need to be friends. Especially if she can teach me how to wear deep red lipstick without looking like The Joker - I am so, deeply jealous of people who can pull off that look. Anyway, girl crush aside, she's a fantastic designer. I absolutely adore the dress she made for this challenge, and I think I may have officially deemed her my new Jillian for the season.

And then, there's Suede. Wicked annoying, yet astonishingly talented. I can't believe the craftsmanship on this dress. He had the same crappy "remnants of nonsense" as everyone else, and yet, he melded them together in a way that was uniquely appealing. NatP gushed, Heidi's younger alter-ego swooned, and even MK bowed to the tulle. While I think Kenley's design was clearly more chic, Suede's was just plain cool...and you have to give credit where credit's due. But it's lucky for him someone from Bluefly wasn't on the panel, because they'd have gone for the other dresses in a heartbeat. This creation is gonna be a bitch and a half to mass produce.

And then, there were the losers, or as Stella (ugh, Stella!) would say, the "loosahs"...

Yikes. In the immortal words of Laura Bennett, that is some serious ugly. But, in the end, Wesley's frock was so tacky, it personally offended Nina. And when you offend Nina, you know what happens...auf with his head! Still, I'm a bit conflicted about Wes' departure. I mean, on the one hand, I felt like he had a lot of potential...but on the other, what sort of vision can someone in boat shoes really bring to the table?

The rest of the designers skated through with ease, which I know upset a few of the Blayne-haters out there. I do see where the haters are coming from - B, stop trying to make "licious" happen - but I am still giving him time to grow on me. And people, his Stella impression? It's growing on me.

Hélène hates herself for loving you.

Ooooh, Suede. In all your denim vested, blue fauxhawked, third-personed glory, I just had to grow to loathe you. And then, you go and do this...

...and you just make me love you! Damn it!
I even want those shoes!!!

Oh the deep, internal struggle that is PR fandom.
(Recap on it's way in a few. Mama need her coffee first, kids.)

P is for Pterodactyl

Also, for previews:

Two dudes kind of remember seeing Kelli in high school

Wayside Stories from Westland High School, Galloway, Ohio.

Sam:
"I don't think I'm going to say anything very quotable. So you want to know about this girl from my high school. So just talk about her, is that it? Yes. Ok. So, I don't think I ever had class with her, but she was one of the people that stood out because most of the people at my school were pretty boring. She was one of the goth kids, but not like the trenchcoat, all-black kind of goth. More of the dye your hair pink, wear spiky things... sort of Lords of Acid goth. Also personality wise, from what I could tell, she was outgoing. Julian's girlfriend was probably friends with her. So she may have something more to say? Do you have Julian's number or email? I think that's it really. I didn't actually know her, or probably ever talk to her. I think she was one or two grades ahead of me. Probably just one."

Gabe:
"Yeah! And I totally remember her ... I think she used to have more piercings and those big sinister go-go boots."

Fascinating!

"I saw something ... that looked... strange." (For Hélène)

Poor Jerry.

Not a great sign when Nina's opinion of your outfit could work as testimony in a Law and Order episode. Or when MK does his pyscho killer impression.

Indie Influx

Speaking of hipster overdose, it appears that Natalie Portman will be the guest judge for Wednesday's green challenge.

Hmm....this Natalie Portman?



I mean, did Leanne make all of these?
It's kind of in the bag, indie chicks.

Keeping up with the Joneseseseses

This season's designers are fab! Besides being cuter than 10 minutes on the DailyPuppy.com, they also seem to want to win and be great, and not in an evil way. It's too early to know if they're going to be as oddly selfless as last season's group (which if you will remember was like, "Frankly, I think I should go home because really it's the right thing to do. I love my team/ hate myself."), but they are just as adorable. Let's meet the Joneseseses.

In no particular order unless most favorite to least favorite counts as an order:

Leanimal:

Rrrrroarrr, girlfriend. Get those raspberries.

Self-proclaimed the "Silent Fashion Assassin," Leanne tells us she hails from all the way out-in- left-field-Portland. Yeah, I thought she was going to be like, "all the way from Peoria, Wisconsin Illinois." Mais non. Portland it is. What I love about Leanne, aside from her awesome clothing line name, is her awesome clothing line.

Oui.

Oui!

Wee!

Also loved when Leanimal was like, "I had no idea where we were going. An amusement park... a zoo ... a farm .... a rodeo ... a hemp festival... " At which point during the show Maud wondered if Leanimal wasn't on her first field trip to New York. Cute.

Leanne's dress. Eeehhh... Not the best, not the worst. She gets points for making her model look like a pink toy poodle, something I'm currently in the market for.

Call me if you've seen this dog. I will buy.

Jennifer Golightly:

I liked Jen's Holly Golightly / Dali portfolio less than Leanimal's, but her personality is super fun and she just seems salt of the earth, this one. J Ho will probably prove to be another season 5 silent fashion assassin, but an Italian one, even scarier.

Things we have in common:

I also regret not brushing my teeth (this morning).
I love Italy.

Things we do not have in common:

I would actually love to meet Tim Gunn when wearing nothing but a towel, because then he could dress me. (Tim Gunn, if you're reading this, I'm wearing a towel. Please help.)

Kenley Kennelley III:

Um, btw, where did Bravo pick up all these indie girls? It's like Tim Gunn walked into a Tegan and Sara show in a Velcro Suit and fled out the back with whoever was hanging on. I mean, they're sweet. But Jennifer/Leanne and Kenley/Emily are sort of doppelgangerish, no?

Kenley's look is one of my favorites. I'm not a fan of strapless anything usually, but this is cute and flirty, and it probably doesn't hurt that her model has a perfect body. Her portfolio is kind of rad too.

This reminds me of something I would buy when suffering from a Potbelly milkshake sugar high during a shopping trip. Makes no sense, can wear it nowhere, love it, will pay with Visa.

Kelli de Columbus, Local Hero:

Kelli de Columbus, I love. First of all she reminds me of my friend Michelle, Vice President of GNC, also from Columbus, also totes rad. Secondly, Kelli went to high school with my designer friend Gabe (designer friend Gabe's website), and kindred spirit-- also Gabe's best friend and Michelle's brother-- Sam. (Sam's website.) My point here is not to shamelessly promote my genius friends, but rather to show you how Kelli's awesomeness is not surprising given her stomping grounds. There's something in the white russians in Columbus I tell you.

Moving on. I agree with Helene that the coffee filters are ... something I'd rather see in coffee pots than on boobs. And I love coffee. Maybe if there was some intravenous caffeine device cleverly hidden behind the filters... otherwise, I call wardrobe malfunction, cute skirt.

Daniel my brother, you are older than me... :

... But that's ok I would still have your little baby animals.

Daniel is foxy, literally. "If I wasn't a designer, I'd be a zoologist." Hi Daniel, um, me too. I've said for years that if I wasn't a secretary at a nonprofit or wannabe blogger, I'D be a zoologist! We are obvs MFEO.

Sigh. Our sexuality stars may not align, but at the very least he and I have been to some of the same parties.

From Dan's portfolio:

Ruff! Love it!

Whew! There are so many designers! What is this, week 1?

Back in a few with more Joneseseseses.

Stunway on Location

Coming atcha, live from the source.

Vitamin D Gone Wild

At 9:13 p.m. this Wednesday, I decided that season 5 is maybe already the best season ever.

Recap coming pronto. In the meantime, welcome back and SUP HOLLAA!!

"Do I think it's pretty? No."

You know how sometimes, you don’t truly realize how much you miss someone, until you finally get to see them again? Yeah…that’s how I feel about Michael Kors. It’s just, I’m sorry, but that snarky little man is my everything. Each time I hear him say, “she turned the corner,” I writhe in anticipation of the verbal onslaught about to befall his unwitting prey. He just makes this show for me.

Having said that, um...the bitch is out of his friggin gord! He thinks “a girl's gonna really wanna wear” THIS?

Pardonnez-moi, Michelle, however, I am a girl (and a fairly girly one at that), but you couldn’t pay me to trot around Manhattan with coffee filters on my boobs. (False: you so could. But I’m on the brink of incurring massive student loan debt, so don't judge.) Who exactly would WANT to wear that dress?! The skirt, maybe, okay...it kind of looks Anthro, actually. And the hooks made out of notebook rings? Um, yes…talk about innovation. But the TOP! For the love of God, judges, THE TOP! It's burnt coffee filters with some sort of perverse, peekaboo triangle! I’m not saying don’t give Kelli the silver, because, sure, she deserves at least that….but first prize totally should’ve gone to my boy Daniel. His buxom beauty worked the hell out of those solo cups, and ya know, given the right circumstance, that just might be something a girl would want to wear...

The "right circumstance," being some sort of Jetsons-themed sorority function, but still.

Also, remember when I said that Kelli deserved the silver? I lied. Daniel deserved second, and KENLEY deserved immunity! But, alas, she wasn't even in the top 3! Wassup, Nina?! This photo doesn't do her creation justice, and, in my opinion, her snubbing is a travesty on par with Jillan's exclusion in the menswear challenge...

PS calls BS...HELLO – that’s a couple of lawn chairs and a dodge ball up there, people! So, for the best combination of wearable and innovative, my vote goes to Miss Kenley. Congrats, love.

And who should’ve been auf’d? Well, therein Michael found his sanity...albeit through his description of a mad scientist. MK's face after describing this outfit was PRICELESS (we're working on the screenshot, of course). Lest ye forget, he and Nina said Jer's creation looked "like what you’d wear if you were gonna kill someone.” That’s Kors gold. Just brilliant. Also, dead on. The model was so, clearly pissed about wearing those gloves; she looked on the verge of a murderous rampage.

Aside from that, I can’t even get IN to Blayne and Stella right now....there are too many words....

I've so much more to say on the models, the mayhem, and the Michael, but I simply must get to bed. I’m seeing the inventor of the Interwebs tomorrow, and I have got to look good when I thank him for making this blog possible...

Sleep tight, stunnas.

When reality becomes a fantasy...

Welcome back, PR faithful! Now that we have full access to the new casts' bios (gracias, BPR!), it's time we all take a long, hard look at their body of work, formal training, and, um, actually....screw that. Let's pick teams!

It's time, once again, for Fantasy Project Runway! As some of you may recall, last year, Team DanielVosovicShouldveWon tragically underperformed, finishing in something like two millionth place (out of two million). But this year, I am determined to break the top 100! For this reason, I have decided to choose my team in the same tried and true manner by which I created my March Madness bracket. That is to say, nonsensically. And so, I give you, Team DuBlonde!

Yeah, drink it in, bitches. My logic is quite simple, really. First and foremost, did you read Keith's bio? His personal mantra is, "Get noticed, or go home." Um, MINE TOO! In, Keith. You. Are. In. And Kelli? Well, she's from Columbus, so...done. And sure, there were 2 contestants from the O-H, however, on Kelli's myspace page, she has really pretty red hair, but now, she's a blond. And I kind of love people who change up their hair color all the time and still look cute, so, Kelli - you can stay. And that leaves Leanne. Leanne made this:

Pretty! I'm sold.

I hope everyone caught the sneak peek of tonight's episode during last night's Flipping Out, but if you missed it, you may be delighted to hear that we'll be kicking off this season à la corn husk dress...meaning, at the market! And not just any market...Gristedes! Hooray! Well, wait, I kind of hate Gristedes. That place always smells like soup, and I cannot pronounce it's name for the life of me (which is why I always call it, "Crescendos"), but it was the site of a pretty fierce challenge once upon a season one, so, I'm psyched to see it set the stage for Challenge Un. Get excited, friends!

***UPDATE: Upon viewing the 60-second life stories, Kelli has been brutally auf'd from the team, in favor of Jerrell, who is, by the way, fabulous. Sorryboutchaluck, KelBel.***

Clothes Encounters of a Fierce Kind

Famous NYC attorney, my friend, Matthew Skinner attended the Tonys recently (whenever the Tonys were) and ran into His Fierceness, Christian Siriano. Amazing.

Mr. Skinner also hung out with Rami "his pants are even tighter in person" Kashou at a gay bar "last weekend." Read on for deets and other Stunway celeb sightings.

Matt Skinner sits down with Project Stunway over a cup of Facebook:

Project Stunway: Matt. Can you tell me why and how you are partying with CS? I am excited and it wasn't even me.

Famous NYC Attorney Matthew Skinner: Haha, it wasn't so much partying with him as it was running into him outside the Tonys and standing next to him for 2 seconds while my friend took the photo.

In other news, though, I did see Rami last weekend at a gay bar. He, however, was surrounded by a harem of gorgeous male supermodels that did not give me a bloody inch to make a move and try to get a photo. Also, his pants are even tighter in person.

Project Stunway: Very nice! do i have permission to blog?

Famous NYC Attorney Matthew Skinner: Of course! And please use my name. This is the closest to my 15 minutes I may ever have. And everyone at the firm already knows about it anyway, I e-mailed it to all the recruiting people to put it on the brochures for next year.

Project Stunway: Totes fierce! I'll let you know when it's up.

Other Stunway Sightings:
DC socialite Nancy Powaga was running on the National Mall last week when she spied our favorite Bravo beauty queen, Kayne Gillaspie.

Nancy: guess who i saw at lunch!?

me: WHO

Nancy: Kayne Gillaspie

me: shut it

Nancy: it's shut

i was running on the mall

and he was across the street

with some man

and they were wearing matching outfits

he was wearing white shorts and a black tanktop

me: perfect

Kayne and "some man" Warren?

A very good place to start.

Spoiler Alert: Austin Scarlett is AMAZING.

Oh, and he'll be the guest judge for Wednesday's episode. Say it with me, people...YAAYAYAYAYAYAYYYAYAAAYYY!!!

This should ensure that anyone incapable of couture gets to steppin' week one, because Austin will not tolerate anything less than haute. The episode summary for Let's Start From the Beginning, states that the designers will be forced to "think outside the box," and construct an outfit from "unconventional materials." Hmm...dunno what that means. Also, don't care! Everybody, Austin's back!!!

I hope he wears his cape.

"A Big Wow"

Project Mum-way?

Does anyone else think it's weird that the new promos for Season 5 don't, um, promote Season 5?

Well, I certainly do, and apparently the fellas over at Project Rungay have some worries as well. They've taken an interesting cut at some theories for this perplexing marketing strategy...and also included clips of the promos in question. See for yourself:

Click, click!

(Here's hopin' it's not theory one - good loooooorddd.)