Thursday, January 3, 2008

Stream-of-Consciousness-Blogging is the New Live-Blogging

Episode 6, as seen from inside the mind of Hélène du Blonde:

I’m sorry wah-hut? Steve was just auf’d last episode? That feels like AGES ago! So 2007.

I love that they use the Elle magazine with Reese on the cover in the intro. My roommates and I still have it on our side table because her hair is so fantastic in that picture. Love Reese.

Kevin’s cubicle buddy is gone. His chest hair remains.

Christian doesn’t care that Steven is out? I am shocked and outraged at his lack of concern for other human beings. That was a lie.

Heidi looks pretty again - Red lips and red shoes! Is this becoming a thing? Her not dressing like a crazy person?

Everyone gets new models because they haven’t been used in forevs. Xtina picks LEA! WTF is UP with Lea. I am not drinking the Lea Kool-Aid quite yet. Her designers haven’t even won a challenge, right? So, why’s she so great? Hey! Sweet P wasn’t picked last!!!!! Way to go! DAH NOT KATIE!!!! SWEET P GODDDD! This is why you deserve to go last! Rami changes – atta boy! My roommate, Katrine, thinks his old model may or may not be a dude. “THAT’S A WIG!!!!” she exclaims. She could be right….

6 a.m. at New Gotham…braless Kit greets her mentor. “I was in my pajamas in front of Tim Gunn, that’s really kind of tragic.” Oy, Kit, your wakeup hair is tragic.

RICKY WITHOUT A HAT! RICKY WITHOUT A HAT! REWIND!

Based on outfit selection, Rami thought this challenge was taking place in a discothèque, and Jillian thought it was on Ork.

Chocolate is magic? Oh, Elisa. You’re like a miniature Buddha. I’ll miss you when you’re auf’d in one to three episodes.

Candy lady says Hershey’s Time Square is the sweetest place in New York. False, that’s Pinkberry.

Amid the piles of chocolate, my mind is drawing parallels between Christian and Veruca.

Back at Parsons, the designers consume candy. Beware the sugar crash, designers! Sugar is poison for the creative juices!

Jillian is the only one using an edible product? Go J Bugg.

Sweet P feels guilty about killing stuffed animals, lives up to adjective in name.

OH MY GOD TRASH CANS OF PEANUTBUTTER CUPS?!??!?!!?!?! XTINAAAAAAH!!!!!! YOU ARE DEAD TO ME!!!!!!!

Elisa has a daughter named Clivey? Could she be more of a hippie? Wait, she got hit by a Porsche? A hippie got run over by a Porsche? It’s okay to laugh at the irony since she’s still alive, right?

Hiiiiiiiiiiiiii Rami. You’re pretty.

Katrine and I just giggled for 3 minutes straight about Tim Gunn saying “maxi pad.”

Jillian’s skirt is all Bob Fosse with fructose! J’adore.

“This is both of us; this is us both looking good.” – Lauren, you are my new favorite model. I mean, I didn’t have an old favorite because I kind of hated them all, but you’re leaps and bounds ahead of the pack, for real.

Xtina thinks E’s dress is a “hot mess.” Also compares her sleeves to swimmies. I find this humorous, but refuse to laugh because I am still pissed about the mass Reese cup slaughter that took place 10 minutes ago.

I am so pulling for Jillian and Rami (as always), they did hard shizz and they made it WORK. They are the essence of Project Runway.

Heidi looks pretty AGAIN. That’s 3 in a row! A style turkey! A hat-trick!

That’s Ricky’s first design that I liked. Ever. Oh look! Chris’s looks like Ricky’s upside down!

Kit uses Kit Kats. Vanity through design?

Ooooh, Kevin’s is wearable. I’m glad he listened to Christian on those Reese cup buttons.

Christian, I’m yawning. Your design bores me. All those precious Reese cups wasted in vain. How could you?

Sweet P, ewwwwww. I can’t get past your model’s shoulder bones, is she even wearing a dress?

RAMI!!!!!!! I LOVE YOU!

JILLIAN!!!!!!!! DITTO!

What is Victorya’s model doing?????? Posen ain’t buyin’ it. His face is all “Uh uh, Queen Frostine.”

JUDGING:

RAMI - Sam is a good model, very good choice. She looks so pin-up, in a good way. You good Rami, you good. You make MK smile! He normally only smiles when he’s ripping on you! Hey, Rami might win!

ELISA – MK asks, “Where’s the joy?” Posen clears up that he’s referring to, “The joy of candy!” Oh Posen. I wonder how are they going to get those silver shower caps on the armless “fashion graveyard” mannequin…

JILLIAN - Zac likes licorice, red is fantastic. Umm this is not her first red dress, I sense a theme. Judges call her design “chic, sexy, sophisticated, edible.” I think those are all compliments. I’m on Team Jillian. Par regular.

VICTORYA – Ice princess from Dairy Queen is not wearable. You’re on my last nerve, Victorya. THANK YOU Heidi for calling her out on that walk. What was that?! For shiz!

MARCH – MK thinks March’s is a smart editing choice. Nina thinks she can be shot for the pages of Elle. I still think his design looks like Ricky’s upside down.

SWEET P – Sweet P bores again. She made Michael Kors sad :( . That’s an auf-able offense, P. If you pick someone other than Twiggy McZerobodyfat next week, maybe I’ll notice your clothes. IF THERE IS A NEXT WEEK! Sweet burn.

TIMEOUT. Umm…Every commercial is for Reese cups or Wendy’s. THANKS BRAVO. New Years resolutions are tougher right now.

BACK. March is in, J Bugg gets robbed, Rami wins immunity. His was good though, for shiz. Props to my 2 faves, they’ve done it again.

In a sad, ironic twist, the candy challenge leaves the sweetest people in the bottom 2. Sweet P is in, delaying the inevitable til week 7.

Elisa exits speaking another language…literally. Seriously, what is she saying?

She wanders off, feeling fortified.

And so do I.

Bonne nuit.

3 comments:

David Dust said...

At the end, Elisa apparently said "Ashay", which is crazytalk for "See ya, bitches!"

Click here for DavidDust’s Project Runway recap.

The Modern Gal said...

It took like two days to register in my brain that Kit used a KITkat design. I probably shouldn't admit to that, though.

Anonymous said...

Actually I think Elisa's daughter's name is Calliope. Which, if you can believe it, is even more hippy dippy than Clivey.